Thursday, July 19, 2012

More Snacks

At this time six years ago I was in agony.  I do not exaggerate.  I mean I do, but there's no need for extraneous storytelling this time.  I'm still fully flummoxed by the events of Katie's birth.  At the time I hadn't been diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder, so it hadn't occurred to me to prepare not just for an eight pound mass passing through my vagina, but to pass such a mass while in the throes of a nineteen and a half our panic attack.  If I had known myself better when I had Katie, I would have asked for anti-anxiety drugs.  And I would have hired a doula.

Anyhoo, that was six years ago.  So much has changed.

I thought parenting would be about handing down wisdom to my life apprentice.  Our relationship is actually much more reciprocal.  I learn just as much from Katie as she does from me.  Like how nice it is to live in the moment and not worry too much about the past or the future.

I got a good Katie Quote tonight.  I asked her, on the eve of her birth, what she thinks will be different about being six than being five.

Without taking a moment to ponder the question, Katie reported, "I'll get more snacks."  

"Why will you get more snacks when you're six than when you're five?"  I asked, trying not to smile too much or she'd think I was making fun of her.  She's been very sensitive and moody lately.  A couple of times recently I've thought I was just teasing her but my words turned to tears on her cheeks.  

"Because my tummy will be bigger when I'm six.  Everything will be bigger since I'm still growing.  So I'll get more snacks to fill my bigger tummy!"

Of course.  Sometimes the answers to life's big questions are just that.  More snacks.