Tuesday, October 4, 2011

The Kissing Disease


I remember when I was in about fourth grade the worst thing a person could imagine having was mono: the kissing disease. Friends at recess discussed how they heard that someone's sister had to stay in bed for a month! No playing outside. No TV. Not even books. She was so sick she had to just lie there and do nothing.

Fourth graders do not abide doing nothing.

A few months ago after a routine blood test I got a note from my doctor saying that I did not currently but had sometime in the past had mono.

Really?

How can you have mono and not know it? Was one of those times I dragged myself to the shrink to adjust my meds or get back on my meds or try a different type of cognative therapy, thinking I felt exhausted and overwhelmed because of my posttraumatic stress disorder, actually when I had mono? The kissing disease? I'm a freakin' forty year old married mother. Mothers don't get mono, do they?

I have been kissing my husband for over nine years, so you can only imagine how many times our lips have been exposed to each others' pathogens. How romantic. But I still can't imagine Will giving me mono. That's something only unmarried people give to each other. Married people give each other vacuums and drills. And I don't mean the naughty kind.

But just now, as I passed Katie's bedroom door that's cracked a couple of inches the way she likes when she sleeps, I thought of who I probably got it from. Katie! My kissalicious kid. My kid who is currently napping voluntarily. In other words, she's sick.

Ok, I don't really think my kid gave me mono, and if so, yuck, but I do think she's picked up a bug from school, and most likely there was kissing involved.

She is the kissingest kid I have ever met. The day she was born, I remember the nurse carrying her over her shoulder to me, saying, "You've got a snuggly one, Mama." And she is. This kid knows nothing of no affection.

And there's this boyfriend of her's at school...Aiden. I've seen those two pecking each other's cheeks. Isn't it odd how such a loving act can make you sick?

Here's an e-kiss to you, my friend. Be well.

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